New Week, Same Old Shit.
Written at 9:28 a.m. on 2006-06-12
New Week, Same old Shit.
Hello! I�m back after being �away from the office� since last Monday. I�ve had flu and 2 exams in this time and have come back to discover that thanks to the bizarre recent heatwave my office is hotter than Satan�s underpants. I have also discovered that no one in my office appears to be qualified to open post as there is a two foot high pile of the stuff on my desk. I�ve moved it to the side of the desk and am making a valiant attempt to ignore the pile entirely. At some point I suppose I�ll have to look at it but I reckon I can ignore it for a bit longer before feeling obliged to deal with it. There were also 30 odd messages in my email inbox that I have also managed to ignore so far on the grounds that they are going to be asking me to do some boring stuff that I won�t want to bother with so I�m best off not looking for a while. Ah the joys of being back at work after a bit of a break����..
In other news it is only 4 weeks and 5 days till my wedding. That isn�t very long is it? The little fastener on my wedding skirt needs moving because rather than getting thinner through stress, which was my plan, I appear to have got fatter. I have in the past year gone from a UK size 8 to a UK size 12. Now I realise that at 5ft 10 a size 8 is not ideal and I should be closer to a size 12 to look more in proportion but is there some reason my body can�t put the extra weight on in an even coverage rather than gathering in unattractive and frankly rather alarming splats of excess fat around my midriff? I mean I�ve got really skinny arms and my calves aren�t too bulky either, they could easily accommodate a bit of extra bulk but no, it has to go in the middle doesn�t it? I might have to start attending the gym with a little more diligence since I only have a month to shift it and I love food so I refuse to go on a diet. It�s not the wedding I�m worried about because a wedding dress hides a multitude of sins, it�s the honeymoon because a bikini is somewhat less forgiving!
Wanker of the Week award for the 4th week running goes to M�s friend Ross who this week has managed to come up with more shit to wind me up. I think I�ve mentioned Ross before, he�s the twat (I know it�s a rude word but trust me, he�s earned it) who is meant to be M�s best mate but who announced he was leaving part way through the wedding reception because there was a race he wanted to run in in the Lake district on the Sunday. Well now he has announced that he isn�t coming to the stag do because he can�t be bothered, he won�t wear the kilt that the other ushers are wearing, he won�t sit on the top table because he isn�t sitting on a table without his wife Roxy (the amazing no-speaking woman), he is in the Lakes and isn�t coming back early so he won�t be coming to the wedding rehearsal, he�ll be leaving the reception early to go back to the Lakes and do his crappy race and (and this is what really set me into a freefall rant) despite the fact that we said to everyone that we aren�t having children at the wedding, he�s bringing his daughter who is 2 and a half. My cousin Nicola isn�t coming because we said no children, my cousin Chris is leaving his daughter with his mother in law, all my mates with kids have made arrangements for their kids and if they couldn�t they�ve said they couldn�t come and all these people are going to be seriously pissed off if they�ve been told that they can�t bring their kids but Ross can. I�m not even going to get started on this one or I�ll start ranting but let�s just say I have informed M that I think Ross is a twat and he is not to bring the child because I�ll have to spend my entire wedding day apologizing to offended people who�ve left theirs behind. The man is a selfish, childish twat who has had a problem with my wedding right from the time he found out how many people were going. M says it�s because he only had 4 people at his wedding. Well if that�s the way he behaves towards someone who is meant to be his best friend then I can�t say I�m bloody surprised. Apparently Ross thinks that the amount being spent on my wedding is obscene. How exactly is the way my parents spend what they have worked hard to earn any business of the high and mighty Ross? It isn�t, that�s how.
Oooh I�m wound up again now. Am off to go kick the post heap round the office!!!
Edit: Added at 10.26am - Right, some guy called Jim Ferguson appears to have added me to his MSN messenger list and he keeps messaging me to say hi and how are you doing. He's been doing this for a couple of weeks and I've ignored him entirely because I have no idea who he is. I don't recognise the name and looking at the picture on his messenger thing I just do not know him. Then he messaged me this morning to ask how I was and how was my night out. How does a man who I've never met and have ignored studiously know how to spell my name (which is an unusual spelling, half my family get it wrong) and how hte hell does he know I had a night out planned? Should I be worried and if so what do you do in this situation?
